It is not until now that I am typing this that I realized…I picked St. Andrew’s because it had a 4:00pm Mass. I had to pick this time for Mass because I was going to a BBQ at my friend ANDREW’S house……kind of funny, ironic, or coincidental….It never is!!
Anyhow, I went to Mass in Bridgeport…..but on the way up I had a “discussion” on the phone with my daughter. I have decided we do much better texting than we do talking!!! When I got to the church, I felt the tension in my back, that the chiropractor just cracked out of me earlier in the morning, tighten its way from my neck to my hips. He had asked me earlier, “Do you have much stress in your life right now since the kids are all grown?” I have known him for 30 years….so I laughed and said, “Are you kidding me??”
I sat in the middle of the pew (Nobody ever does…they all sit on the ends of the pew, if you have ever noticed.) The church was fairly modern looking with a beautiful stone backdrop to the altar. Two older deacons and the Haitian priest came down the aisle. Although it was an English mass, I wasn’t quite sure of that when the priest started the homily. I had to adjust my listening skills to move past his island accent. And then the message came through…..”God graciously gives us all we need. He knows our needs and generously gives us what we need.”
I was sure in that moment God had been listening to my conversation with my girl in the car!!!
I started running through my head…….I need patience, I need the grace to let go of my growing children as they become adults, I need to recognize that I do not have control over the things in their lives that I used to control, I need a skill set that matches my parenting role for the here and now not the same skill set I have always used. Does HE really know that?? I wish HE would graciously and generously bring to me what I need right now.
I looked around the church. The average age of the attendees was probably 65 or 70 years old. I tossed a lot of thoughts around in my head and guessed that about three quarters of these people had already received the gracious and generous gift from above with regards to letting go of what you know and control with your kids to accepting the new role of this phase in parenting. I have to admit it was a lot easier when they listened to EVERYTHING I said……
I left St. Andrew’s a little more settled than when I had walked in. As I pulled out of the driveway I had 3 thoughts….
1. Be patient. He knows what I need and I will just have to be ready for when the shift happens.
2. Stick to texting with my girl……we always do better that way!! Someday, maybe we will communicate better…but I have always believed she and I are more similar than we are different…so hopefully we will figure it out.
3. Remember to pick up the lemons and limes for the vodka clubs at Andrew’s!!